Heartless
by Kaz010
Summary: Season 3 from Jess' POV
1. Chapter 1

**TITLE: Heartless**

**RATING: T (for language)**

**This is the first chapter from a strory that I'm working on. It takes place during "Take The Deviled Eggs" and the following episodes. Its going to be mostly canon but there might be where it veers onto AU territory. Sorry for the shortness!**

_I've got a knack for fucking everything up._

_My temper flies and I get myself all wound up._

_My fuse is short and my blood pressure is up_

_I lose control and I get myself all wound up._

_Tension mounts and I fly off the wall_

_I self destruct and I get myself all wound up._

_Petulance and irritation sets in_

_I throw a tantrum and I get myself all wound up._

**_Bab's Uvula Who? By Green Day_**

* * *

He was a moron. A complete and utter moron. And the fact that he knew he was a moron was not making his mood any better.

"What's up with you tonight?" Shane asked, from the passenger seat, as she filed her nails absently.

"Nothing."

"Well how come we aren't making out or you know, doing anything _fun_?"

He snorted. Making out with Shane was anything but fun. It was in fact mind numbingly dull, but the mind numbing was what he needed. He used Shane to forget about her. _Rory. _But even after a good half hour of necking he couldn't get her out of his head.

(_"Oh, and by the way, you left your bra in the back seat.)_

He threw his head against the headrest and sighed. He had wanted her to be jealous (not that he'd left the bra there intentionally. Well…..) but she had looked more disappointed in him than anything. He shouldn't care what she thought. But in reality her thoughts were the only ones he did care about.

Why had she kissed him if she had no intention of being with him? He knew she knew what coming back to this god-forsaken town had meant, _("Just wanted to" _Translation, "I came for you.") And when she had kissed him, he had felt elated and even as he watched her run away he had felt that his luck was beginning to change. For once he was going to get the thing he wanted most.

Then nothing. For weeks nothing. Then to see Dean walking about clutching a pile of letters from her, he saw red. She wasn't interested! She'd made him believe in her, in them and the future and now…..nothing.

He'd went out, managed to get hold of a few beers and met Shane as she came out of the Beauty Supply Store and that was that. He had forgotten about those sapphire eyes for the first time in months and it had felt so fucking good.

And now, there she was on his brain again. And it sucked.


	2. Chapter 2

He gaped at his car unbelievingly, it was a mess. "Luke!" he bellowed for his uncle. "Have you seen this?"

"Seen what?" Luke asked walking over to him, "What happened?"

"Someone egged my car."

"Jeez, it stinks!"

"It's gonna take me forever to clean this up." Jess huffed.

"These eggs are cooked." Luke pointed out.

"What?"

"They're not raw eggs. They look like…devilled eggs."

"Someone devil-egged my car?"

"Well, that is paprika." Luke smirked.

"Someone prepared devilled eggs to throw at my car?" He asked incredulous.

"Man, they must hate you a lot. Hey, maybe it was the guy in the garden department?"

Jess gave his uncle a dirty look, "I'm gonna go get something to clean this up."

"Or maybe it was the assistant night manager?" Luke continued to tease, "You guys have words in the snack room?"

He came back to his car fifteen minutes later, laden down with buckets of water and all the cleaning products he could get his hands on. He looked at his car again and shook his head angrily. The thing that really pissed him off was the fact that he knew that if he had done this to someone else's car he'd be standing at the side sniggering as the poor sod cleaned it up. He hated being on the receiving end!

He soaked a rag in the bubbly water and began to scrub. Just then Rory and Lorelai walked past.

"I was home all night last night." Rory said.

"So was I," Lorelai added, "We have alibis and everything."

He watched them walk away giggling, let out a sigh and continued the dirty task of cleaning the car.

* * *

The next morning saw him in charge of the diner while Luke went to the whole sellers, luckily it was quiet so he didn't have much to do besides refill coffee cups and give people their change. He looked up as the door opened, and immediately hated himself for the rush of happiness he felt at seeing her. He watched as she tried to decide where to sit, although it was quiet most of the tables were occupied by single people and their morning newspapers. She looked up at him and frowned as she took a seat at the counter.

He placed two cups in front of her and began to fill them with coffee. She placed her hand over one cup and pushed it back to him, "It's just me today. My mum has to work."

"So it took me nearly an hour and a half to clean that crap off my car." He said conversationally.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, I guess who ever done it must have been pretty upset with me. You wouldn't happen to know who I've upset would you?"

"Nope. Sorry." Rory answered, taking a sip of her coffee.

"You're a lousy liar, you know that?"

"What?"

"I read that people have these non-verbal signs when they tell a lie. They look at the floor, or play with their hair or blush…..you do all three."

"I'm sure I don't know what you're on about." She said, deliberately not looking at the floor.

"Hmm. Do you know what you want?"

She looked at him wide-eyed, "I uh, uh, what?"

"Breakfast? Do you know what you want?"

"Oh! Breakfast, right! Well I usually have pancakes but I think I want something different today."

"Different is good." He nodded.

"Yes it is. But sometimes it's easier to stick to things that you know." She said quietly.

"Sometimes you have to break away from the things that you know to discover what you really want." He told her, knowing that they were no longer simply discussing breakfast. "Besides pancakes are awfully stodgy."

"They are not stodgy! They're lovely and nice and I love them."

"Well then, I guess it's decided that you'll have pancakes?" His eyes darkening.

"I'm not hungry anymore." She told him, standing up and handing him the money for the coffee.

He sighed, hating the fact that he'd screwed up this moment. He hardly ever got to see her on her own, without Lorelai or god forbid, Dean hanging about. "Rory-" He reached for her hand but she was already out the door.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for those who have read and reviewed. If you have read and haven't reviewed...please do! Reviews are love! Shameless begging over. Hope you enjoy this chapter :)**

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That night, Jess sat at the dining table in the apartment he shared with his uncle, his homework spread around him. Of course he wasn't actually doing any of the homework, but in order to keep Luke off his back he had to keep up appearances. He drummed his fingers on the wood as his mind once again wandered to Rory.

He'd spent the better part of a year chasing her. He'd always prided himself on never having to chase the girls, but then none of the girls had been the type he would intentionally chase (unless they stole his wallet. The down-side of hooking up in a grotty New York bar.) But the minute he'd laid his eyes on her he had wanted her. Those eyes of hers had stunned him, and the volume of books on her bookshelf had made him re-evaluate his pre-conceived notions of small town girls.

There was something about her, something indefinable that touched him in a way no one had before.

Rory was just….. _Rory._

He _knew _her. What would make her smile, what would make her laugh. Most definitely what would make her mad. He knew not to clear her plate away, even if she hadn't touched the food in 5 minutes as she would no doubt go back to it. He knew the books she would like, the ones she wouldn't and the ones she would warm to after she heard his views on it. He knew she liked him, and he knew she knew that he liked her too.

But he would never make the first move. He'd thought about it. She'd be sitting on the other side of the counter, rambling on, and he'd have the urge to just lean over and shut her up.

The phone rang breaking his reverie. He walked over and picked it up. "Hello?"

"Do you wanna meet up later?" A voice asked.

"Shane?"

"Who else? Well, do ya?"

"''Nothin' better to do."

"Cool. Pick me up in half an hour?"

"'Kay." He hung up. He really wasn't in the mood for Shane tonight really but he was really not in the mood for anymore of these Rory thoughts.

He put some Bowie on the CD player, peeled off his shirt and went into the bathroom to brush his teeth. He was working his toothbrush over his back teeth when he heard a noise in the apartment. Thinking it was Luke checking up on him he stepped out from the bathroom.

"Oh my god!" Rory spluttered.

" Rory?" He asked spraying toothpaste foam everywhere.

"Oh, I…..well I. See you were meant to be doing homework, so I wasn't expecting you to be here. Well I did expect you to be _here _here but I expected clothes. A shirt of some type. I…I'm rambling. I'm stopping." She rushed, "Now."

He stepped back into the bathroom, spat the toothpaste out and quickly washed his face. He came back out to see Rory, red-faced looking up at the ceiling.

"Counting the cracks?"

"What?" She asked looked at him, then back up to the ceiling the next instant. "Oh, no. It's just a really nice ceiling."

He snorted amusedly, "It's only skin Rory."

"Yeah. Would you be saying that if I was standing here half naked?"

"Huh. I don't know." He rubbed his chin, "Maybe you should take your shirt off so we can see. As an experiment."

"Shut up. Can you please just put some clothes on?"

"Um…."

"Please. I'm getting a stiff neck."

He pulled a shirt from the dresser and flung it on. "Okay, I'm decent."

She looked down, and rubbed her neck. "Thank you."

"So I take it you didn't just come up here for the peep show?" He sat down on the chair and pulled his Converse sneakers on.

"No. I need my copy of The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie for a school project."

"Okay." He rummaged through a pile of books on the coffee table and handed it to her. "I put notes in the margins, they might help with your project."

"Thank you. You're notes are usually helpful….when they're not completely trashing the author.!

"No trashing in this one. I got the feeling this was more than just a fictional story."

"It is. She had a teacher like Jean Brodie when she was at school."

He nodded, and they stood there awkwardly for a moment. Neither knowing how to progress the conversation without somehow getting into an argument.

"Well, I'm going to go…..work on the project."

He nodded again, and gave her a small smile. He watched her walk to the door, the book clutched to her chest. "Jess?" She whispered as she opened the door.

"Yeah?"

"The peep show was a nice bonus." And with that she walked out the door, leaving him staring at it with a slow grin stealing over his face.


	4. Chapter 4

**Authours Note: I have abandoned my writing for too long. I have a pretty quiet week so hopefully get this story updated more, got lots of ideas flying around in this skull of mine! This is really short but I wanted to atleast post something.**

**Please r&r, reviews are love!**

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Jess had rarely seen Rory since the impromptu peep show he had given her, and when he had seen her she had been with her mother, Lane or the bag-boy and had avoided any kind of eye contact with him. He had once again decided to give up on the whole Rory thing, there was no way it was going to happen. He came downstairs to the diner to find his Uncle standing at on the front steps of the diner looking over to the square.

"What's going on?" Jess asked, joining him.

"They're setting up for the dance marathon."

"The what?"

"It's a twenty-four hour thing, last couple standing win a trophy."

"Wow, sounds super." Jess muttered. "Are you dancing?"

Luke turned to look at his nephew, eyebrows raised "No."

"Aw, come on Uncle Luke I bet you could cut a rug with the best of them."

Luke opened his mouth to retort then thought better of it, he knew Jess could and would happily play verbal volley all day but he had a diner to run. "Don't you have school?" He asked instead.

"I do." Jess agreed.

"So?"

"And I'm going now." He grabbed his jacket of the coat rack and saluted his uncle as he sauntered towards school.

* * *

Jess sat in class with his textbook opened in front of him but his mind was elsewhere. He was thinking about this stupid dance marathon. He knew Rory would be there. She always attended these town events, she seemed to love them. He knew how her mind worked in so many ways but then things like her total loyalty to this town confounded him.

What he was trying to work out was whether she'd be dancing or there in some other capacity, and how he could get to spend time with her. _Jeez,_ he thought, _so much for forgetting about her. _

"Mr Mariano?"

Jess looked up to find his geography teacher staring down at him, "Bell rang two minutes ago, and as much as I am thrilled to see that you want to spend more time in my class not doing the work I have other pupils who are coming in now who do do the work so….."

Jess grabbed his stuff and left the class room, mentally shaking himself for getting caught up in thoughts of Rory Gilmore once again.


End file.
